Ada Eliot Sheffield to Emily Hale

T. S.Eliot
EmilyHale
TS Princeton
31 Madison Street,
Gray Gardens,
Cambridge
22 October 1933
DearSheffield, Ada Eliot (TSE's sister)replies to EH on TSE and divorce;d1 Emily:

Itravels, trips and plansTSE's 1933 westward tour to Scripps;a8Ada on;b4 am glad of an excuse for writing to tell you how much good you did Tom last winter. His whole atmosphere and expression was happier after his return from the west, and continued so throughout his stay.

YourChristianityAda on TSE's personal piety;a3 very difficult questions I will answer in accordance with my best understanding of Tom. I think you underestimate the strength of his feeling toward his Church. Mrs Hinkley believes his change of faith to have been an escape from personal unhappiness. In my own opinion, while this may have played a part, the roots of his conversion go much deeper than that. His writing and his talk all reveal a profound sense of the value of tradition, reaching back far into the past, changing by slow growth, but never breaking with what has gone before. He attends mass with great regularity, makes confession as the Church requires, has attended a religious retreat this fall. He speaks at Church conventions, is active in their counsels, and has three times this summer visited in the homes of leading clergymen. Moreover, the Church is backing him in this most trying step which he is taking. IfEliot, Vivien (TSE's first wife, née Haigh-Wood)the possibility of divorcing;f2in Ada's opinion;a6 he accepts this backing for a separation, which is the most the Church will endorse, and then, having got this much, were to leave the Church, in order to get a more complete release from his bonds than they would recognize, he would feel himself to be doing something unhandsome.

This brings me to another aspect of the matter. Were Tom to give up his Church for the sake of a woman – which I do not believe he would ever do – his respect for himself would suffer. This would inevitably end by affecting his feeling for the woman herself, and she would not be happy. It would be like Mertoun [Miltoun] and Audrey in Galsworthy’s Patricians.1

If you can continue Tom’s dearest friend, giving and receiving confidence and affection, you will be a constant source of happiness and strength to him. For you to suggest anything else would, I believe merely cause him added suffering.

As regards the step with [sc. which] Tom is now taking, I have had two regrets. One of these is that he did not release himself from his unhappy ties years ago, and the other is that he cannot have a complete divorce. To me it would seem entirely unreasonable that any one should pay a heavy a penalty for a youthful mistake. ButSheffield, Ada Eliot (TSE's sister)distinguishes her faith from TSE's;d2 alike as Tom and I are in some respects, we are different in just those respects that make him a devout Anglo-Catholic and me an equally reverent – as I hope – agnostic. Tom will never again be a Unitarian, and he is a man whose nature craves a religion.

IHinkleys, theignorant of TSE's feelings for EH;d2 think you are right in supposing the Hinkleys to be unaware of Tom’s feelings toward you. Of course I have said nothing to enlighten them. If you ever feel a desire to write to me, I shall be glad indeed to hear from you. And should you turn up here of course we must get together. The last time saw you was at a luncheon at the Hinkleys, and I felt a congeniality. It is not often one feels that.

Cordially yours,
Ada E. Sheffield

1.John Galsworthy, The Patrician (novel, 1911).

Christianity, and human isolation, and modern economics, Ada on TSE's personal piety, scheme for 'Pro Fide' bookshop, among the Eliot family, and beauty, its sects like different clubs, Anglo-Catholicism, TSE's conversion to, which he dates to Eccleston Square meeting, Anglican Missal sought for EH, but unfortunately out of print, discussed at Boston Theological School, and the Petrine Claims, apostolic succession, over Roman Catholicism, as refuge from VHE, and the Reformation, asceticism, discipline, rigour, the necessity for, and TSE's daily exhortation, making and breaking habits, mastering emotions and passions, as salubrious, only remedy for a prurient culture, confession and communion, more possible during Harvard year, the case for unattainable ideals, in time of war, gets TSE up before 7 o'clock, hereditary with TSE, belief, and good poetry, faced with Second World War, and conversion, antidote to TSE's skepticism, Christendom, TSE ponders the decline of, TSE on his prominence within, its ruin, the Church Visible and Invisible, and TSE's war work, the Malabar Church, prospect of total reunion within, confession, helps to objectify sin, more dreaded than dentist, harder in the morning, death and afterlife, the struggle to prepare for, consoles TSE in life, and cremation, Requiem Mass, gives meaning to life, and what makes a desirable burial place, the nature of eternal life, divorce, unrecognised by Anglo-Catholic Church, which TSE regrets, in church law, would separate TSE from Church, evil, TSE's belief in, and moral percipience, guilt, and the New England conscience, hell, TSE's 1910 vision of, and damnation, according to TSE, liturgy, TSE's weekly minimum, Mass of the Pre-sanctified, Requiem Mass versus Mass of Good Friday, and whether to serve at Mass, Imposition of Ashes, at Christmas, High Mass over Mattins, aversion to Low Church Mattins, Roman service in Wayland, Tenebrae, in country parish church, as guest at Kelham, remarkable sermon, over Christmas, Tenebrae and Family Reunion, during Holy Week, Mass of Charles King and Martyr, love, loving one's neighbour, marriage, TSE's need for privacy within, mysticism and transcendence, interpenetration of souls, intimations of life's 'pattern', 'doubleness', arrived at through reconciliation, orthodoxy, only remedy for contemporary culture, and pagans, sets TSE at odds with modernity, necessarily trinitarian, 'Christian' defined, iniquities of liberal theology, and creed, authority, Transubstantiation, TSE disclaims 'self-centredness' in maintaining, politics, the Church and social change, how denomination maps onto, need for working-class priests, church leaders against totalitarianism and Nazism, Christianity versus Fascism and Communism, Papal Encyclical against Nazi Germany, the 'Dividend morality', Presbyterianism, TSE quips on the meanness of, Quakerism, resignation, reconciliation, peace, TSE's love allows for, 'peace that passeth all understanding', the struggle to maintain, following separation from VHE, retreat and solitude, EH at Senexet, the need for, a need increasing with age, and TSE's mother, Roman Catholicism, TSE's counter-factual denomination, Rome, sacraments, Holy Communion, marriage, sainthood, TSE's idea of, the paradoxes of, susceptible of different sins, sins, vices, faults, how to invigilate, the sense of sin, the sinner's condition, bound up with the virtues, as a way to virtue, TSE's self-appraisal, when humility shades into, when unselfishness shades into, among saints, proportionate to spiritual progress, daydreaming, despair, lust, pride, perfection-seeking pride, spiritual progress and direction, TSE's crisis of 1910–11, EH's crisis, versus automatism, TSE's sense of, towards self-knowledge, in EH's case, as personal regeneration, temptation, to action/busyness, the Church Year, Advent, Christmas, dreaded, happily over, TSE rebuked for bah-humbugging, church trumps family during, season of irreligion, thoughts of EH during, unsettling, fatiguing, in wartime, Easter preferred to, Ash Wednesday, Lent, season for meditation and reading, prompts thoughts of EH, Lady Day, Holy Week, its intensity, arduous, preserved from public engagements, exhausting but refreshing, excitingly austere, Easter, better observed than Christmas, missed through illness, Unitarianism, the Eliots' as against EH's, the prospect of spiritual revival within, as personified by TSE's grandfather, regards the Bible as literature, as against Catholicism, divides EH from TSE, and whether Jesus believed himself divine, according to Dr Perkins, in England as against America, over-dependent on preachers' personality, TSE's wish that EH convert from, outside TSE's definition of 'Christian', the issue of communion, baptism, impossibly various, virtues heavenly and capital, bound up with the vices, better reached by way of sin, charity, towards others, in Bubu, TSE's intentness on, delusions of, as against tolerance, chastity, celibacy, beneath humility, TSE lacks vocation for, faith, and doubt, hope, a duty, TSE's struggle for, humility, distinguished from humiliation, comes as relief, greatest of the virtues, propinquitous to humour, not an Eliot virtue, opposed to timidity, danger of pride in, is endless, TSE criticised for overdoing, theatre a lesson in, most difficult of the virtues, possessed by EH, possessed by EH to a fault, TSE compares himself to EH in, the paradox of, distinguished from inferiority, self-discovery teaches, possessed by Dr Perkins, patience, recommended to EH, its foundations, possessed by Uncle John, purity, distinguished from purification, temperance, with alcohol, beneath humility,
Eliot, Vivien (TSE's first wife, née Haigh-Wood), takes a liking to EH, EH urged not to blame, relations with Charles Buckle, unbearable to holiday with, takes to Margaret Thorp, accompanies TSE to Poetry Bookshop, and 57 Chester Terrace, on TSE's religion, TSE declines invitations excluding, her driving, hosts various writers to tea, considers flat in Gordon Square, arranges large tea-party, as theatregoer, declares desire to make confession, taken to Eastbourne, recalls the Eliots' visit to Rodmell, Alida Monro reports on, in Alida Monro's opinion, falls out with Lucy Thayer, meets TSE for last time at solicitors, seeks TSE's whereabouts, haunts TSE in London, such that he forgoes the theatre, news of, inquires after Man Ray portrait, harries F&F office, on Mosley Albert Hall rally, dies, her funeral, Requiem Mass for, Theresa remembers, marriage to, TSE on entering into, alleged affair with Bertrand Russell, sexual relations, its morbidity, TSE on his own incapacity, its torments providential on reflection, in OM's opinion, its lessons, humiliating, TSE's father's reaction, unrecognised by TSE, to outsiders, TSE reflects on, painful yet stimulating, as an act of self-rupture, drug habits, sleeping draughts, in TSE's absence, 1926 bromidia delusions, mental state, childlike, benefits from active social life, compared to EH's mother's, at the Malmaison sanatorium, and dining in public, TSE's influence on, post-separation, the prospect of institutionalising, prompts institutionalisation crisis-meeting, and TSE's departure for America, against TSE going, adjusting to the prospect, might coordinate with a return to Malmaison, in denial as to, threatens to come, from which TSE tries to dissuade her, aggrieved at being left, possible arrangements in TSE's absence, still in denial as to, TSE dreads scene of departure, possibly beneficial to VHE, TSE describes the moment of departure, separation from, TSE, for and against, out of the question, obstructed by self-deception and responsibility, reasons for not having happened, Dr Miller's opinion on, contemplated, plotted, would necessitate TSE's sequestration, TSE encouraged in his determination, Alida Monro independently suggests, communication with solicitors on, TSE describes going through with, VHE's response before and after meeting at solicitors, impasse over financial settlement, which VHE misrepresents to friends, VHE in denial over, separation deed drawn up, which is yet unsigned, delayed by death of lawyer, general impasse, financial settlement put into force, complicated by VHE renewing lease on flat, efforts to retrieve TSE's property, which is eventually recovered, financial consequences, the possibility of divorcing, TSE's objections to, against what TSE symbolises, likened to Newman's conversion, in common and canon law, in Ada's opinion, how TSE's attitude might seem, would involve permanent division from Church, inimical to future TSE's happiness, her death, and Theresa on TSE remarrying, TSE's shifting response to, formerly wished for, EH reflects on,
see also Eliots, the T. S.
Hinkleys, the, during TSE's student days, in London, cheerful but somehow stunted, take to Evelyn Underhill and Harriet Weaver, taken on Bloomsbury tour, OM on, TSE reflects on their departure, have never asked after EH's mother, not in TSE's confidence as to EH, at odds with TSE's view of marriage, EH yet to confide in, more conventional than moral, bemuse TSE, their company makes TSE feel wary, outside Ada's confidence, TSE repents of criticising, more intolerant even than TSE, apprised of TSE's separation, ignorant of TSE's feelings for EH, EH explains relationship with TSE to, family drama of Dane babies, supported Landon over FDR, their insularity, their family sclerosis, TSE imagines EH's evening with,
Sheffield, Ada Eliot (TSE's sister), TSE's most likely family confidant, to host TSE on Boston return, TSE pictures his birthday-party with, Madison Street preferable to Eliot House, after seventeen years' separation, TSE begins to confide in, TSE and Henry visit together, accompanies TSE to Wellesley, counsels separation from VHE, speaks frankly with TSE about his domestic affairs, hosts post-Radcliffe Club reception, hosts the Eliot family Thanksgiving, attends second Norton lecture, hosts Wellesley English faculty and TSE, remembered in St. Louis, and TSE to discuss Yale lecture and VHE, hosts TSE for last time, informs the Hinkleys of TSE's separation, replies to EH on TSE and divorce, distinguishes her faith from TSE's, takes to Frank Morley, on the Perkinses, TSE advises on wines, on Aunt Susie, EH urged to be familial with, her struggles for independence, as sounding-board for EH's career, TSE's favourite sibling, shielded TSE from over-bearing Hinkleys, incompletely aware of TSE and EH's relationship, within the Eliot family dynamic, seems 'reserved' to EH, at Hinkley dinner, invites EH to lunch, reports improvement in EH's spirits, hosts TSE on 1936 arrival, and Marion and Theresa's Murder party, reassures TSE about Henry's ears, subscribed to CNL, her intellectual orbit, on Hastings's bust of TSE, war jeopardises TSE seeing again, apparently ill, recovering from major operation, has cancer, has second operation, ailing, in reportedly critical condition, her death contemplated, TSE's intimacy with, TSE's deathbed correspondence with, remembers TSE as boy, pursuing intellectual interests from deathbed, her place in the Eliot family, dies, in Henry's final report, EH describes her funeral, New York Times obituary, Boston Herald obituary, Sheff's memorial tribute to, TSE on her final illness, TSE's absence at death, wished for on VHE's death, invoked against EH,
see also Sheffields, the

2.AdaSheffield, Ada Eliot (TSE's sister) Eliot Sheffield (1869–1943), eldest of the seven Eliot children; author of The Social Case History: Its Construction and Content (1920) and Social Insight in Case Situations (1937): see Biographical Register.

travels, trips and plans, EH's 1930 trip to England, EH's proposed 1931 England visit, called off, EH's 1932 summer holidays, the Eliots' Derby Day excursion, related, the Eliots' July 1932 Hindhead visit, the Eliots' August 1932 Eastbourne holiday, described, TSE's 1932–3 year in America, Norton Professorship offered to TSE, and the prospect of reunion with EH, which TSE refuses to see as decisive, which angers EH, who writes and destroys a response, TSE's financial imperatives, TSE's itinerary, and the question of discretion, opportunity for adventurous lecture-tours, TSE speculates on attendant feelings, TSE on the voyage over, TSE reflects on, TSE's return from, the Eliot family's Randolph holiday, TSE's 1933 westward tour to Scripps, proposed to EH, and TSE's need to lecture, possibly via St. Louis, TSE's itinerary, possible stopover in Seattle, a shameful source of happiness, still a happy thought, described by Havens and others, TSE reflects on, TSE's return from, TSE wonders at after-effect on EH, EH urged to reflect honestly on, Ada on, and a conversation about divorce, in EH's recollection, possible EH 1933 summer in England, TSE's 1933 Faber summer holiday, set for mid-August, postponed, rearranged, TSE buys summer outfits for, described, TSE's 1933 tour of Scotland, possible itinerary, Morley's preparations for, described for EH, TSE's 1933 trip to Paris, mooted, described, EH's 1934–5 year in Europe, TSE delighted at the prospect, attempts to coordinate with TSE's 1934 summer plans, the Perkinses due in Chipping Camden, EH's itinerary, TSE's initial weekend at Chipping Campden, TSE books rooms in Lechlade, TSE visits Campden again with family, and again alone, which visit TSE reflects on, TSE's plans to entertain EH en route to Europe, EH's continental itinerary, VHE and propriety inhibit pre-Paris arrangements, L'Escargot lunch, weekend in Sussex for EH's birthday, possible London tea-party, second lunch at L'Escargot, EH and TSE's November excursions, a month which TSE reflects happily on, EH's summer 1935 plans, EH departs England, EH in Florence, arrived in Rome, TSE coordinating with EH's return, TSE recommends Siena, EH returns to Florence, EH sails for Riviera, EH returns from France, L'Escargot lunch on EH's return, EH sails for Guernsey, May 1935, EH's June 1935 London sortie, TSE attends Dr Perkins's birthday, TSE's July 1935 Campden week, TSE offers to fund EH in London, where EH joins Jeanie McPherrin, TSE's Campden birthday weekend, prospect of EH spending month at Blomfield Terrace, Thorp theatre outing, TSE's 6–8 September Campden weekend, EH staying at 19 Rosary Gardens, EH to Campden for 15–17 November, EH sails for Boston, EH and TSE's final farewell, TSE and EH's final weeks in London, their excursion to Finchampstead, TSE reflects on, excursion to Greenwich, EH reflects on the final weeks of, TSE's 1934 Faber summer holiday, described, TSE's dream of Cairo, TSE's invitation to Finland, palmed off on Robert Nichols, TSE's 1935 tour of Scotland, proposed by Blake, attempts to coordinate with EH, TSE's itinerary, TSE's 1935 Faber summer holiday, TSE writes from, described, TSE's 1936 visit to Ireland, TSE's itinerary, recounted, TSE's spring/summer 1936 trip to Paris, first contemplated, date fixed, Morleys invited, TSE's itinerary, recounted, TSE's 1936 Faber summer holiday, TSE writes from, TSE's 1936 American trip, spring arrival dependent on New York Murder, if not spring, then autumn, possible excursions, autumn better for seeing EH, and possible Princeton offer, and possible Smith visit, efforts to coordinate with EH, passage on Alaunia booked, TSE's itinerary, Murder to pay for, coordinating with Eliot Randolph holiday, the moment of parting from EH, TSE's birthday during, TSE reflects on, TSE's 1937 tour of Scotland, itinerary, recounted, the Morley–Eliot 1937 trip to Salzburg, contemplated, itinerary, EH receives postcard from, described, as relayed to OM, EH's 1937 summer in England, and Mrs Seaverns, EH accompanies TSE to Edinburgh, itinerary coordinated with EH, dinner at L'Escargot, TSE's 10–11 July Campden visit, TSE's 17–22 July Campden visit, TSE's 21 August Campden visit, EH travels to Yorkshire, TSE reminisces about, TSE's 1937 Faber summer holiday, TSE reports from, leaves TSE sunburnt, TSE's 1938 trip to Lisbon, outlined to EH, TSE advised on, travel arrangements, the voyage out, described, EH's 1938 summer in England, and whether EH should spend it at Campden, EH's arrival confirmed, TSE's July Campden visit, EH's late-July London stay, TSE's 5–21 August Campden fortnight, TSE's 3–6 September Campden visit, EH's September London stay, TSE reflects on, TSE's 1938 Faber summer holiday, TSE's preparations for, TSE reports from, possible EH England Christmas 1938 visit, possible TSE 1939 visit to America, mooted for spring, complicated by Marion and Dodo's trip, shifted to autumn, threatened by war, made impossible, EH's 1939 England visit, TSE's efforts to coordinate with, threatened by war, complicated by Marion's arrival, EH's itinerary, EH's initial London stay, TSE's 7–20 July Campden visit, TSE's 22–30 August Campden visit, TSE's 2–4 September Campden visit, EH again London, EH and TSE's parting moments, in TSE's memory, memory vitiated by EH's subsequent letter, TSE's 1939 Faber summer holiday, TSE writes from, possible wartime transatlantic crossings, contingencies, in case of EH being ill, TSE's reasons for and against, and TSE's New York proposition, following invasion Denmark and Norway, impossible for TSE unless official, TSE's desire to remain in England, TSE's reasons for and against accepting lectureship, given Ada's impending death, TSE's abortive 1940 Italian mission, possible but confidential, lectures prepared for, and the prospect of seeing EP, might include Paris, itinerary, in jeopardy, final preparations for, cancelled, TSE's 1940 visit to Dublin, approved by Foreign Office, in national interest, itinerary, recounted, involves TSE's first plane-journey, TSE's 1940 Faber summer holiday, TSE reports from, TSE's 1941 Faber summer holiday, Kipling and fishing-rod packed for, TSE reports from, TSE's 1941 Northern tour, proposed by the Christendom group, arranged with Demant, itinerary, recounted, TSE's 1942 British Council mission to Sweden, TSE makes cryptic allusion to, as recounted to EH, as recounted to JDH, return leg in London, as war-work, TSE's 1942 New Forest holiday, described, TSE's 1942 week in Scotland, recounted, TSE's abortive 1942 Iceland mission, TSE's 1943 trip to Edinburgh, recounted, TSE's abortive 1943 Iceland mission, TSE's 1943 New Forest holiday, TSE's 1944 trip to Edinburgh, TSE's abortive 1944 North Africa mission, TSE's May 1945 trip to Paris, described, TSE's June 1945 trip to Paris, recounted, possible post-war American visit, and Henry's impending death, ideally ancillary to work, possibly as F&F's representative, waits on TSE's health and Carlyle Mansions, TSE's 1945 September fortnight in Lee, described, TSE's 1945 Christmas in Lee, described, TSE's 1946 summer in America, date for passage fixed, paperwork for, TSE's itinerary, its aftermath, recounted, TSE's 1947 summer in America, dependent on lecture engagements, TSE seeks to bring forward, Henry's condition brings further forward, set for April, itinerary, EH reflects on, TSE's scheduled December 1947 visit to Marseilles and Rome, itinerary, TSE's preparations for, dreaded, Roman leg described by Roger Hinks, EH's hypothetical March 1948 visit to England, TSE's postponed 1948 trip to Aix, itinerary, recounted, home via Paris, TSE's 1948 trip to America, itinerary, TSE's visit to EH in Andover, disrupted by Nobel Prize, TSE's 1948 Nobel Prize visit to Stockholm, itinerary, recounted, TSE's 1949 family motor-tour of Scotland, described, TSE's October–November 1949 trip to Germany, possible itinerary, preparations for, final itinerary, TSE's account of, the return via Belgium, TSE's January 1950 voyage to South Africa, all but fixed, itinerary, described by TSE, recounted by Faber, EH's 1950 summer in England, TSE books EH's hotel room for, TSE's efforts to coordinate with EH's movements, EH in Campden, TSE reports to Aunt Edith on, TSE's 1950 visit to America, and TSE's possible Chicago post, the Chicago leg, November itinerary, TSE's spring 1951 trip to Spain, itinerary, recounted, TSE's September 1951 Geneva stay, itinerary, recounted, TSE's 1951 British Council mission to Paris, recounted, TSE's second 1951 British Council mission to Paris, recounted, TSE's 1952 visit to Rennes and the Riviera, itinerary, recounted, TSE's 1952 visit to America, itinerary, efforts to coordinate with EH's summer, TSE on meeting with EH, TSE's 1952 rest cure in Switzerland, TSE's 1953 visit to St. Louis and America, set for June, to include fortnight in Cambridge, itinerary, EH's 1953 trip to England, EH's Alnwick plans, TSE books hotel for EH, and EH's ticket to Confidential Clerk, TSE's 1953 visit to Geneva, TSE's 1953–4 trip to South Africa, itinerary, described, arrival described to JDH, GCF on, TSE's 1954 Geneva rest cure, Geneva preferred to Paris, TSE's deferred 1955 visit to Hamburg, prospect inspires reluctance in TSE, proposed for spring 1955, dreaded, TSE now returned from, TSE's 1955 visit to America, and contingent speaking engagements, foreshortened, itinerary, Washington described, TSE's return from, TSE's 1955 Geneva rest cure, TSE's 1956 visit to America, passage fixed for April, itinerary, TSE in the midst of, TSE reflects on, TSE's 1956 Geneva rest cure, itinerary, recounted, illness during, EH's 1957 visit to England, TSE and EVE invited to Campden, TSE reciprocates with London invitation, but EH leaves England abruptly, which TSE consults Eleanor Hinkley over, who duly explains, TSE and EVE's 1958 trip to America, as rumoured to EH, EH's 1959 tour of Scandinavia, funded by bequest from cousin, TSE and EVE's 1959 trip to America, TSE and EVE's 1963 trip to America,